It’s a strange feeling losing one of your heroes. For many of us that lived in Orlando in the early 2000’s, we’ve now lost two. Michelle Beckman and I met in 2004, when I was asked to help lead a retreat for Student Venture. About a year later, I was an intern for Student Venture, and got the pleasure of sitting at the feet of Michelle on a weekly basis, as she would show us how to sit at the feet of Jesus. Michelle became like a wise sister to me, and to my wife, and she became someone on my “must visit with” list whenever I could get back down to Orlando. Michelle achieved the highest honor I believe anyone in the world could: to be so rooted in Christ, that when I think of Michelle, I will remember her most for her passion for the Gospel. When I say the Gospel, I don’t just mean that Michelle went and told people about Jesus, although she certainly did that. Michelle LIVED the Gospel and it was her filter for everything: that she was infinitely sinful but that she was even moreso infinitely loved.
I’d like to sit here and say that I truly believe that Michelle and I had a special friendship. But that is the thing with Michelle: every person who ever got time with her felt that way, and they all were right in thinking that way. In Michelle, Jesus created a woman who was so aware of her own brokeness, both physically and spiritually, and yet knew that the blood of Jesus purchased her back, and therefore, she was the most loving, accepting, and patient woman I’ve ever known.
Michelle was not without her light-hearted goofy side, of course. We all could laugh so freely around Michelle. I remember being on a small group of people in charge of getting food for a leader retreat we were having, and we went and grocery shopped like 10 year olds would if given a blank check and sent into Chuck E Cheese. I remember laughing hysterically as we created an E-Harmony account for her. But mostly I’ll remember how excited she genuinely got whenever she heard stories about people growing closer with Jesus. I’ll remember how she would call me “Hey bro!” and listen to me like I had any wisdom I could offer someone like her. I’ll remember how she taught me that it is sometimes okay to “sit in the mud” because Jesus loves us there too. I’ll remember the things you taught in word and in deed, but mostly I’ll remember that you were always there for us. When Lindsay and I would fight about something, you would facetime us. When I was coming to town, you would clear your schedule. When I would try and reach out to people, and they would reject me and mock me, in tears, you were there to listen and grieve with me, and pray with me.
Michelle, you show us all the most tangible Person of Jesus Christ that many of us will ever get the chance to encounter. There is no one else in my life that I am more sure I will see again with Jesus than you. Thank you for your friendship, example, and influence for all these years. My heart hurts with the loss of you here, but it wants to rejoice that you are with your Best Friend. Jesus? Take extra special care of her. There are a lot of us down here that will need that eternity to spend time sitting around on couches talking with the two of you like we did down here.
Life as I see it 